Ya Know what?

Love kinda fuckin' sucks!....sometimes

-I am in the process of getting over a relationship/break-up, and ya know what? I don't like it! I'm a big girl, I'll make it just fine. I'm not worried that I'll never find good love. I'm just in a chronic state of "uuuurrruuuuhhhhggg!" right now, got it?

-I put myself out there (when I wasn't even looking), and it didn't work. Big deal, Life goes on.

-This state of "repair" can't be all bad, right? I tried to drink it off, that didn't work. In fact, it just made me sadder. I am trying this "healthy and active" thing, but i usually chase that with chocolate and french fries. So far everything seems to be really great.

-However, my support circle has been great. I have plenty of great souls to vent to and cry to and drink with and laugh with. That helps so much.

Relationships are not all happy and fun. They require hard work, and commitment. There needs to be balance and chemistry. Intimacy and mystery. Passion and playfulness. I am no expert though.

-I guess I just ‘fell in’ and wanted it to work so badly. I’m such an ‘all-in’ kind of lover. If I’m decided that I like someone, and want to be with them, I just fall right in the deep end. My latest lover was like barely toes in the shallow end. The contrast was too big to dissolve. So we split.

It hurts. That we’ll never love again. Never engage in a long-lasting hug again. Never BE in love again.

What ever.

Cheers to moving on.

Listening to: Ray Lamontagne--God willin and the creek don't rise